Monday, January 31, 2011

I hate Walmart...

...perhaps even more than I hate Radio Shack. I realize that I may be making myself sound like a total snob right now, but I don't care. It is full of herds of ill-behaved children and rude people. Are the aisles narrower at Walmart than at any other store? Because I cannot push my cart down any one of them because people and their carts are camped out in the very middle and they do not respond to your presence next to them. You are expected to wait until they are good and done and ready to move, and they won't budge one second before that moment, thankyouverymuch.

I would avoid the place entirely, but my mother is visiting and she has her prescriptions filled there. God knows why. I've tried to convince her that her copay will be the same no matter where she goes, but she has bought the ads on TV about the cheapness of the Walmart pharmacy, I guess. So, tonight, like a good daughter, I stopped on my way home from work to pick up her prescription. I also had something that I had to return (from the last time we went to Walmart to pick up a prescription). This meant that I had to stand in every line at Walmart.

First, I stood in the line to return stuff. This is where I encountered the Very Large Close-Standing Man (VLC-SM). The VLC-SM was approximately 6'5" tall and weighed roughly as much as a small car...and he liked to stand just slightly too close to me in line. When I finally got to the front, I breathed a sigh of relief. Now I could move away from him! Except when I did...he inched forward and got right up on me. Repeatedly. Then he saw his friend Steve across the store and had to yell at him really, really, loudly. It was a long wait.

After I dealt with the return, I had to stand in the pharmacy line. It was long. When I finally got up to the counter, the lady informed me that my mom's prescription was not ready and that they had a 3-4 hour wait time. I gave her my best, "I'm pissed, but willing to be reasonable" look and informed her that my mother had called the prescription in at 9:30am and told them that I would be picking it up at 6:30 that evening, so I had already waited well over her 3-4 hour window. She talked to her manager and said it would be ready in 15 mins. Hallelujah. I went and picked up a few other things that I needed.

Then I got to wait in the pharmacy line again.

Then I got to wait in the regular checkout line because they will not ring up your items at the pharmacy counter if you have more than 4 things. I got in the inappropriately-named Express lane. When the people in front of me left after a lengthy discussion with the cashier, I piled my stuff on the belt only to be informed by the cashier that I would have to wait a moment. He left. Everyone behind me in line started moving lines, but I was the unfortunate one with all of my crap on the belt. So, I waited...and I realized that the previous customer's total was still showing on the register and her bags were still there. When the cashier got back he took her gallon of milk out of the bag and tried to shove it in the cooler with the bottles of soda with limited success. Finally he finished, voided her order, and rang up one of my items....whereupon the lady showed back up. She said, "Oh, did you put it all away?" The cashier looked at me and said, "Oh, sorry, let me ring her up." I rolled my eyes and sighed and the lady said, "Oh, fine, ring her up first." Um, yeah! Since he had already started, I think so!

There was more after that...I got lost on my way home (don't ask) and I ended up behind a piece of road equipment driving at 5 mph. By the time I got home I thought my bladder might burst (the only thing worse than shopping at Walmart is using their bathroom...shudder). I decided to get Subway for dinner because the way my night went I thought I might just burn the house down if I tried to use the oven! Hopefully I can avoid Walmart for at least another month.


  1. I avoid Walmart purely for the damage they have wrought to international labor and environmental practices. (Anyone want to see what they have to do in Chile to get salmon produced at the price Walmart demands?) The fact that shopping there resembles an afterlife punishment from a particularly vindictive religion just makes my moral decision even easier to live with.

  2. Ugh. I hate hate hate Walmart and refuse to shop there... for all of the logical reasons Nick mentioned and the ickiness factor that you reminded me about. That store is just the worst!!!