Jon Story #2 - Jon vs. Food

So, continuing with my Jon stories, here are two short anecdotes about Jon and his tendency toward culinary ineptitude.

Apparently, when Jon first moved into his own apartment (as opposed to the dorms where they cook for you), he decided to make a frozen pizza for dinner. Ah, frozen pizza. The ultimate bachelor food. It's sooooo easy! All you do is throw it in a frying pan on top of the stove and heat!

Wait, you mean that's NOT how you cook a frozen pizza? Well, tell that to Jon. He swears that it turned out OK, but I imagine it wasn't pretty. Apparently, he ate it anyway, though.

Jon also likes to call me up for advice on various girl-related things such as cooking rice. He called me up one night and said, "Hey, how do you cook rice? I bought a bag of rice, but I don't know how to cook it and I have a girl coming over soon." I patiently explained that the way to cook rice was to turn the bag over and read the back where it said, "Instructions" or possibly "Directions" and then do what it said. He was pretty amazed at my culinary prowess. "Wow! How did you know to do that?" he said admiringly.

I really enjoy these two stories because it wasn't like he screwed up complicated French recipes or something. He just didn't read the darned package! Twice!

Ah, Jon...