Tuesday, February 20, 2007

Apparently, Bike- and Car-Jackers are Morons

Brian's stolen bike has been recovered, and the Baltimore Police has a lead on the perp. How did the cops find a nondescript single-speed mountain bike in a medium-sized city like Baltimore? Here's Brian's explanation:
Apparently this criminal mastermind nearly ran into a cop car while riding the bike. He tried to ride away, but wasn't very successful. I conjecture that he didn't know how to ride that kind of bike. So he ditched it to run and got away.
I guess I shouldn't be as surprised at this development as I am: anyone who takes up bike-jacking for employment or entertainment can't be that intelligent. This reminds me of my mother's recent run-in with the criminal element:

She was confronted at gunpoint in a parking lot and forced into her car. Her assailant then attempted to drive the car away, with her in it. He was unable to operate the vehicle because it had a manual transmission, so he fled. Thus, my mother was saved from who knows what fate by the perp's ineptitude.*

* And her own frugality. Those of you who've met her may realize that it's perhaps her most distinguishing characteristic.


  1. That's a crazy story. I was honestly just wondering if that ever happened during car jackings just. I guess my truck is safe.

    What a terrible experience for your mom, though. Good grief, held up at gun point and nearly kidnapped.

  2. No kidding. And this was all just moments before her side of my family was about to meet for the nearly annual Christmas Eve dinner. I think she had 2 margaritas that night, rather than her usual 1.